Sleep deprived parents can fake alertness, writes a Huffington Post contributor.
Here are some tips for those in the early stages of sleep deprivation for how to fake looking awake at work when you have been up half the night soothing a baby/toddler or catching up on emails:
1. The obvious one. Drink lots of caffeine. Where at all possible, hook yourself up to an intravenous caffeine drip, although it’s best not to overdo it. You can end up a trembling wreck and then you’ll have to cover up the twitches.
2. Keep talking. Listening requires much more energy and if you keep talking, at least you’ll still be awake. Remember at all times to keep busy. You won’t last five minutes if you start watching the clock.
3. Divert attention from the nonsensical nature of your sentences. After one hour’s sleep, sentences tend to begin and then be left hanging in the air as you forget where it was you were going and where it was you had come from. Avoid this at all costs, unless you want to appear mysterious, like you are having so many deep thoughts that you can’t possibly finish a sentence without more thoughts crowding in. You know that diverting attention works with children who are throwing a strop. It also works on adults. If you are involved in a meeting about some obscure point of strategic planning, bring in some extraneous and entertaining anecdote. It will wake the others up too.
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